Friday 28 April 2017

Grief will give rise to healing

 Welcome readers, 

Life has an uncanny way of happening to open our eyes to things right in front of us, to reflect on things inside of us and acknowledge the grace with which we are blessed to live each day. Yesterday started off so beautifully for me, and by the afternoon it turned into one of anguish, shock and grief. We were informed of the death of a little 3 year old girl, who although she experienced bouts of illness, her death came as a huge shock to her family. 

Less than a year ago I wrote a piece on teenage suicide and how my eldest son had to deal with the death of a classmate ("Without the Darkness the stars can't shine", May 2016), and how he needed to be supported through his period of grief. At the funeral of this little girl yesterday, I witnessed the gut-wrenching, soul destroying grief of parents who have to deal with the mortality of a child, one still in her formative years. I cannot begin to imagine the dark space they find themselves in today, having to explain to the 6 year old sibling where his little sister is, wandering through the home she filled with her unique spirit. This period is the grieving, and takes the form of intense emotion, and yet it is an essential time which will heal the pain of loss. The varying states of emotion of shock, confusion, denial, anger, sadness, rage, depression and isolation all help one grieve- I have experienced all of these firsthand due to loss, and without giving the mind and body time to process it, one can remain in a grieving state for a very long time. I believe that whatever happens is by the grace of the Divine, and that from all trauma something else will emerge, however if we don't allow ourselves the space to deal with these emotions, one can become stuck in a very dark place. 

Healing will take its time, and if given the space, one will eventually resurface from the intense grief with a level of acceptance and a sense of peace. It is at this time we accept the grace of the Almighty, when we look ahead and start to mourn. Grieving and mourning are two very different states, one (grief) being the emotional aspect of the loss and mourning being a more ceremonial process, trying to move forward with the loss as a part of the journey and life. Mourning encompasses the period one goes through while adapting to the changes brought about by the loss. Yesterdays funeral reminded me of my own grief, and it was with sobering sense of empathy to realise what the parents have to still experience whilst grieving. I have only recently moved into mourning for a loss which occurred many years ago, and it was an important self-healing experience; and came with the acceptance and understanding that there was no other way it could have played out. The path was divinely set out, and I am merely a part of a greater plan. 

Today's look embraces the beauty of nature, and how we live each day by the grace of the Divine, we are all part of a greater whole. We all fit into each others space as we go on our way, and impact others and the environment  whether we know it or not. Our prayers, thoughts and words create a ripple effect and can be tangibly felt. So I strive to live consciously each day, grateful for every breath and the ability to make an impact. 

This outfit is put together with really old classic pieces, except the shoes (which are usually my weakness). 

Outfit details:

H&M oversize knit 
Mango embellished collar shirt 
Woolworths skinny jeans
ZARA loafers
Forever New hat
YSL bag
Dolce and Gabbana sunglasses from Sunglass Hut

Ciao for now,
RuBe xoxo

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