Friday 21 April 2017

A New Landscape

TGIF Dear Readers, 

The Easter holidays are behind us and somehow it has not been as relaxing as I would have hoped. Having a lot of loose ends to tie up and work had me busy throughout the break, I am just so thankful for one day of the long weekend where we spent time with friends in Montagu... It was a brief respite from the crazy, and restored my senses, even if it was just a bit. 

The most significant change this holiday was having a young adult around, whose days were as long as mine, where he would return home after 12 hours of campus! He has taken to young adulthood like a trained pro, able to take responsibility for himself and make the necessary arrangements required to ensure his own success. Obviously, to get to this point, I went through many phases (read more here on the most recent one where he started university), the most notable being the nostalgic phase... Where I reminisced on so many milestones, funny moments and times when he was my little shadow. 

Parenting a young adult is whole new ballgame, on new landscape with a whole different set of rules. I don't think I have familiarised myself with the new rule book, finding myself constantly embroiled in some debate or fight about new boundaries (again!?) Last year, around the same time I was struggling with similar issues (read Defying the rules here) and in hindsight, so much has changed, that despite heated debates, I no longer feel mentally drained when engaging in new negotiations. In this past year, I feel I too have matured in terms of my parenting, I have simmered a little bit and am able to deal with the new landscape without too much resistance and fatigue. 

When parenting, there is so much new ground one has to cover every day, new challenges, both external and internal, that I have learnt so much from these young men. During this past year, whilst going through my own growth, I have also unconsciously developed new tools to deal with my young adults effectively. These new tools have all been developed with the help of my brood, their words of wisdom, their perceptions of situations and simplistic way of dealing with conflict. Without realising it, we have managed to set new ways of negotiation, and even though it feels like a fight, it is merely as simple as having to be ok that life today is vastly different to when I was young. I have had to listen to what their world is like today, and try to make compromises which would be suitable for both them and me. Without an understanding of their world; the boys and I would be at loggerheads every day and I would find myself mentally and emotionally drained. So with my ever evolving methods I continue to parent my young adult and two teens, while trying to maintain sanity and an remaining an integral part of their lives.

Today's lookpost features an oldie, a shirt dress which is probably older than 6 years, when Trenery was still a newish brand in SA. I love the bright coral colour, and the versatility of the dress which enables me to wear it in a variety of ways for a very long time!
I have added a favourite pair of Nine West SA heels, which is also a few years old - my go-to shoe brand which has now withdrawn from South Africa 😟, and a colourful Kate Spade sling bag purchased in Kuala Lumpur two years ago.

Outfit details:

Trenery shirt dress (old)
Forever 21 Leggings 
Nine West SA heels
Kate Spade bag (purchased abroad)
Sass Scarf from Stuttafords
Sunglasses from Zulululu
Mimco stacked rings with charms
Earrings purchased abroad
Lovisa neckpiece

Caio for now, 
RuBe xoxo

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