Sunday 28 August 2016

Ziyaad turns 18 ❤️

Hello darlings, 

This week has been emotional on so many levels, the most notable being my first borns 18th birthday. The day had me reflecting back on the Tuesday morning he was born, weighing in at 3.98kg, with the angry wails of a newborn being separated from the most comforting space in the world. In that instant we went from two married individuals to being parents bound by this little bundle filled with joy and promise.

I can vividly remember the first moment I held you and was struck with a love so powerful and an instinct to protect at all costs- and our bond was instantly formed. We were very young parents, and did the best we could, ensuring at all times you felt loved and safe, yet confident enough to navigate your way in the world. It has been a privilege to watch you develop into the young man, who gives us grief, debates and tests boundaries. A young man who is aware of himself, who has learnt so much about the person he is, and at the same time being perfectly happy with who he has become, the good and the bad. In today’s society, teenagers are their own worst enemies, self-bashing and self-hating that it’s refreshing to come across one who has a healthy self image. Our bond is precious, and I take comfort in the fact that you seek my advice, and that I am privileged to share in so many of your first milestones.
I pray that you remain as authentic and real as you are, I pray that your values instilled in you guide you on your journey and I pray that your path brings you happiness and contentment IA.

I have been struggling with this post, mainly because this is quite a milestone in my own life as much as his. While he enters adulthood, I will be a parent to a young adult, the implications of this is that he will be making his own life choices, independent of me. I will learn to send him on his way in so many endeavours, and hold the faith in the person I know him to be. I will learn to trust that he represents himself in the best way, and if he encounters mistakes, that he learns the lessons it was meant to bring. It’s those lessons I would want to protect him from, shield him from the hurts and disappointments of the world. The reality is, I know that is his path, I understand that those hardships will grow character and strengthen him, so I will send him on his way. 
I will be a shoulder when he needs it, a sounding board, a shopping buddy and I will leave him to find his way. As hard as it may be, we will support him in all his endeavours, all of them on his path away from our protection. Parenting gets more challenging as your charges become more independent, you no longer have the ability to keep them home, choose their playdates and manage their diets. You realise that you become the support structure for them to build their own lives, while they determine their future plans. I am hopeful to remain as integral in your future life as I currently am.

Happy 18th my boy!

2013 overseas trip 
I was privileged to give you your first driving lesson 
Family outings have become less frequent 
The bond with your brothers are special 

Sending you off to your matric farewell 
Your first birthday 
Ciao for now, 
RuBe xoxo

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Friday 19 August 2016

5 Tips to shop and prepare for Spring

Happy Friday lovelies!

We’re more thank halfway through August; Woman’s month and also my birthday month. The warmer days have been peppered in between the last of the Winter days, reminding us that Spring is on it’s way. The flowers have bloomed as if they too are impatient to make their appearance. 

I love Spring, I love nature and flowers, there’s a sense of renewal and rejuvenation in the air that can be tangibly felt. One can even feel it by shedding the heavy layers of clothing, even though it may happen sporadically, and in a flash we’ll find ourselves back in Winter and reaching for those coats and boots. It is time to do a seasonal stock take and get the wardrobe ready for the season ahead. As winter started, I did a post on getting the wardrobe Winter ready, and tips on organising the wardrobe.  (Read the post here). With Spring, I think it is essential to lighten the wardrobe, ie start shedding those unworn pieces, and donating, selling or repurposing them. 

As I have mentioned previously, I do a seasonal clearance- it gives me a good idea of what I have in the wardrobe, what I never wear, what doesn’t fit and what needs to kept and stored for sentimental reasons. Read my post here for tips on the ’stock take’process, which can be followed to organise the wardrobe for Spring and Summer.

Here are 5 tips on how I shop and prepare my wardrobe for the next season:

  1. As the Winter sales are now in full swing, it would be a good idea to keep any eye out for good quality classic pieces that won’t date and will transcend into next Winter. Leather boots and good coats and knits are usually the most costly so now would be the best time to cash in on those sales.
  2. I would already have had a look at the spring/summer trends abroad, in terms of fashion in the northern hemisphere as they are now exiting the warmer seasons. It gives me a good idea of what will be coming into stores for our upcoming season.
  3. These trends will be woven into my current Spring/Summer wardrobe with my trusty classics, and I would identify a few key pieces I would like to have; to transcend into the new season with my own take on the latest trends and fashions.
  4. I specifically keep an eye on modest fashion influencers to keep the inspirational juices flowing, I particularly enjoy styling my pieces in new and different ways.
  5. If I am able, and the costs aren’t too excessive I will purchase some of the upcoming seasons pieces at the sales happening in the online stores abroad (I frequent,, and for specific brands). When purchasing in foreign currency though, please be mindful of the exchange rates, the lead time for a product to arrive (anything from 8 weeks and longer) and very importantly the customs duties to take into account (maximum of 54% of the value of the item as well as handling fees etc.). There are some sites which calculate customs duties upfront, so look out for those.
Today’s OOTD features a sequin t-shirt which I purchased earlier in the year from at a steal! It took really long to arrive, around 3 months but I didn’t need it for Winter so I was happy to wait. I paired it with a boyfriend jeans and blazer for an evening event which required a touch of glam.

Outfit details:
Hat from hubby’s closet
Country Road blazer
New Look sequin t-shirt
Woolworths boyfriend jeans
River Island (Dubai) earrings
Rebecca Minkhoff bag
Vince Camuto iridiscent heels

Caio for now, 
RuBe xoxo

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Friday 12 August 2016

Our Roles as Women

Dear Readers, 

What a wonderfully short week, a perfect way to celebrate Women's Day with a delightful long weekend. 
Even though I don't necessarily subscribe to specific days to celebrate women, it certainly puts the spotlight on the role of women in our society. We fulfil roles as mothers, mentors, home makers, nurturers, teachers, cooks, housekeepers and career women. And whatever role we fulfil, it is significant, as anything we do as human beings, will impact someone somewhere. 

This week has been very special for me, not because of Women's Day, but because the day made me reflect on the roles I play in society and the impact I have on those around me. I always try to be mindful of having a positive impact when interacting, to be kind without compromising myself. After last weeks post on frenemies and toxic relationships, I felt it was important to highlight how I constantly ensure that I am not causing hurt or harm wherever I go. This speaks to authenticity and integrity, and I will always strive to be the best version of me. It would be pointless to expunge toxic interactions and relationships when one walks around with negativity, this then filters into all aspects of life.
The best version of me is what I present to the world every single day, as it centres me, just by being myself, unapologetically true to my soul. I have learnt that by being true to myself and exercising kindness on myself, it naturally follows into my behaviours with others. Every day is an opportunity to improve and to make a difference to others. If I focus on this, without the expectation of anything in return, it creates the space for great things to enter your life. I can honestly say that I have had amazing beings, experiences, relationships and business connections just happen and appear in my space, as if the universe has aligned with my philosophy of 'live and let live'.
So as women and leaders, we set an example to children we nurture; showing them how to be the best version of themselves. We show them how to be strong beings, not swayed by the opinions of others and able to withstand the pressures of their peers. Women may be celebrated on certain days of the year, but we engage our little ones every single day, teach them every single day and shape young minds and personalities, every single day.

"I'm very proud of being a woman, and as a woman, 

I don't even like the word 'feminism' because when I hear that word, 

I associate it with women trying to pretend to be men, 

and I'm not interested in trying to pretend to be a man. 

I don't want to embrace manhood; 

I want to embrace my womanhood."

- Evangeline Lilly

Today's outfit is one worn on Woman's Day, a day I chose to dress up a bit, join some ladies for breakfast before spending a relaxing day with my teens and hubby. I absolutely adore this Human Image sleeveless coat to dress up any outfit, even a t-shirt dress and tights, as can be seen below,

My outift:

Human Image sleeveless coat
H&M t-shirt dress
Hermes belt purchased abroad
Country Road leggings
Witchery scarf
Mimco boots
Chanel bag purchased abroad
Vogue sunglasses by Sunglass Hut
Sterns earrings
Bracelets various, cuff by Raphaella Booz

Caio for now, 
RuBe xoxo

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Friday 5 August 2016

No time for frenemies

Welcome readers!

Winter is still in full swing, however as I write this, beautiful sunlight is streaming in through my glass doors covering everything in a golden light. It reminds that there is always light and beauty in everything around us, sometimes in the most unexpected places. While recuperating I have recently had a lot of time to think about things, to assess life and how much things have changed. 
In the past year I have made so many changes, to myself and the way I do things and interact. I have realised that there are situations that drain energy unnecessarily, people who demand a lot of energy; and I was done tolerating this pointless waste of my energy and time. It  became clear that in order for me to be the best version of myself, for myself, that it would be necessary to eliminate any drain on my spirit.
The word frenemies started to mean something and it dawned on me that it is important for me to trust my intuition, and when I feel that someone is not being true, not cheering in my corner, or genuinely happy for me, that it would be best to steer clear of them. I do not have the inclination to work at friendships dealing in the currency of resentment and envy, there is no space for this in my world. I am of the opinion that every single person enters your life to teach a lesson, or bring some enlightenment, good or bad. And I have realised that positivity and love is not always reciprocated. Being a supportive and loving friend goes both ways and accepting each other regardless, is integral to sharing genuine connections with people. It was undoubtedly time to move on from situations where I have not been accepted (warts and all) and where mutual understanding and support was nothing but a myth. 
I am done with subtle manipulations and innuendos intended to sting, I am done with giving of myself only to be faced with pretend smiles and compliments. I am happy to embrace real friendships, true connections and unwavering acceptance. 

And the moment I reached the place where I refused to accept anything but authenticity from people, my life was infiltrated by a pack of amazing, authentic, genuine individuals. Those who are able to accept what you offer and reciprocate, those who applaud others' achievements without a twinge of jealousy. These 'angels' appeared when I placed importance on my own authenticity, giving of my best and refusing to waste energy on meaningless encounters.

Today's #OOTD features a leather jacket thrown over a long line sweat, jeans and flat ankle boots. A perfect look for everyday running around. 

Asos Leather jacket (old)
Longline Disney Mickey Mouse sweat from Uniqlo (Kuala Lumpur)
Gap Jeans
Accessorize scarf
Michael Kors bag
Forever New necklace (old)
Green Cross ankle boots

Caio for now, 
RuBe xoxo

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