Friday 27 May 2016

The subtext of life

Hello dear readers, 
We have been blessed with another gorgeous day, this mornings sunrise was a combination of orange hues and fog, with a little bit of cloud scattering the dawn skies. 
This week has been filled with beautiful solemn moments, and perhaps they weren't all ecstatically happy moments, they were still filled with beauty. It's a blessing to see all of it, to experience each day with gratitude, for the good and bad. 
Earlier this week I had an interesting discussion with my second born around subtext, and how damaging it is. So often words are uttered with a hidden meaning, and that hidden meaning is intended to hurt or sting. The sting will be felt by the recipient, and yet it would seem as if you had said something that was seemingly kind and innocent. We discussed it for a bit, and he said that it is a norm in his peer group, that everybody says things that they do not mean, but has a different intention to what it seemed. It made me realise that adults do the same thing, when words are said with a (seemingly) simple meaning to the actual meaning. 
This is so damaging to society, and upon thinking about it, I realise that it is used everywhere. Politicians use it, media use it, advertising campaigns use it and parents use it. Statements are made with the intention of stirring emotion, and it may not look like it on the surface. As parents, we play a huge part in this, kids can pick up on unhappiness, tension and anxiety, and when they ask us if everything is ok, the answer is generally "Don't worry everything is fine...". By saying this we are teaching children to ignore their intuition, we are teaching them that even though they know something is not right, that it's ok to use untruths to soothe them. We teach them by example that subtext is the way to deal with each other, instead of just explaining in a simple manner what has really happened, or that something is indeed bothering you. Generally they may not need all the details, but just the assurance that what they feel is real, and that it is ok to verbalise it. By doing this we teach them to be honest in their dealings, it the kindest, most sincere way to function in society today. 
Honesty without the intention of inflicting hurt, is the most generous way to interact with people. Teenagers have so much to deal with as it is, and to add to it, by using subtext in almost every conversation, they will learn that they cannot trust their peers. They will learn to do the same, and because everybody is doing it, that is acceptable. They will instinctively feel when insincere words are being said, and in response they will accept it with artificial grace, but feeling the sting below the surface. 
I cannot stress how strongly I feel about this, about teaching our youth to be authentic with each other. This comes from us teaching our kids that it's ok to be themselves, that being themselves and loving themselves is the first step to successful relationships with others in society.

Today's OOTD features a light pink coat thrown over a lightly layered outfit. The day started out with sunshine and no clouds, and quickly changed to rainy and overcast, so I felt that even the weather held that subtext of a different intention. Hehe
A pair of leather ankle boots from two years ago finished off the outfit perfectly.

Outfit details:
New Look coat (bought abroad)
ZARA t-shirt 
Guess skinny jeans
Woolworths ankle boots
Michael Kors handbag
Scarf old
Caio for now, 
RuBe xoxo

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