RuBe’s Closet - Modest Fashion and Lifestyle: Lacoste

Saturday, 25 March 2017

Detoxing the wardobe (and life)

Welcome readers,

This week's post is a day late, with Fashion Week happening, I have been frantically working, rushing to get mommy things done with enough time to get ready for the shows. I usually don't wear serious make up, and for this event I decided to do a proper make up look.... which takes time for me. So some things (like the blog post) took a back seat, I didn't even have time to schedule it!

Last week I touched on the disasters which happened in the Cape, and as I am writing this morning, we are waiting in anticipation to hear the verdict on shows cancelled at Fashion Week due to extreme weather conditions- and whether there will even be any shows today. The wind has been blustery, blowing everything upside down including such large scale events, a stark reminder indeed that we are not in control of life.

Autumn is on the way, the sun rises later, the temperatures will soon plummet and we will need to layer clothes. This is usually the time I am called in to do a wardrobe detox, or would recommend that it be done. Read more on my wardrobe services here. As with any detox, it's a way of cleansing, whether it is the body, a detox from social media or a general detoxifying of life. In my experience of working in wardrobes, people hold onto items and pieces for various reasons, all of which are not necessarily good. Even holding onto items with the hope that one will lose weight and fit into those clothes again is not the ideal space to dwell in. The reality of weight loss, is that you will be a completely different person (inside and out) to the one who wore those items. You will not be able to relate to the 'old' you and so those clothing pieces will not reflect the new, stronger person you have become.

I usually work in wardrobes where clients need to revisit their wardrobe due to a fundamental lifestyle change, this could mean weight loss (as mentioned above), a change in career path, becoming a parent, widow or just someone who has gone through a process of healing after some traumatic incident. These events change the course of life fundamentally as essentially they empower an individual to a stronger place. During my consult we will talk about colour, styles, preferences and lifestyle, taking into account the impact that a change/adjustment in wardrobe will mean. It is not something to be ventured into on a whim, as our clothing are extensions of ourselves, in some cases it acts as armour and for others it is a vital expression of creativity.

The beauty of life is that we are constantly evolving, without noticing that as events in our lives unfold we make little tweaks here and there based on what we choose to apply to our growth. And with any change, it requires time to become a part of who we are, for us to accept, integrate and to move forward... In the same way a wardrobe detox will be something one has to be ready for- a change which will enhance your self image or at the most dramatic, alter the image you present to the world.

Today's look for me is evidence of how my daily style has evolved to suit my current lifestyle. I am no longer kitted in corporate wear every day, business suits and heels. I am able to dress as creatively as I choose, glam when required, work wear when I feel like it and athleisure for comfort.

This outfit features a black dress, raw silk bomber finished off with sneakers - perfectly relaxed for my busy mom day and chilled business meetings.

Outfit details:

Asos maxi dress

Human Image raw silk bomber

Lacoste sneakers (Asos)

Kate Spade handbag (purchased abroad)

Old scarf

Rose gold shades from Zululu

Lovisa elephant necklace

Ciao for now,
RuBe xoxo

Bohemian miracles

TGIF lovelies!

It is with a grateful heart that I start today's post, the rain pouring down has indeed brought blessings- the answer to our prayers! And it ties in completely with my topic for today...

Earlier this week I heard someone say: "Miracles happen everyday...", but with such a sense of disbelief that it affected me. It got me thinking that we live so obliviously that it would be easy to miss the miracles which occur in our lives each day. The miracle referred to earlier this week was an obvious one, hence the disbelief... and this led me to ponder on the concept of miracles.

Last week I spoke about a sudden death and the importance of being present (read that post here), and the grief must be overwhelming when one is faced with such loss. However, if we look for the miracle in each day, it may make each day more bearable, it may make being present easier. We cannot question why tragedies occur, our constant faith is what get us through the hardships and will ensure that we accept what ever has been decreed. In the same way our faith will enable us to accept miracles without question, without the disbelief and constant wondering why.

The word 'miracle' itself is loaded with implications, it is not easily used, accepted or believed. But if we embrace daily miracles, we become more acceptable of the concept and in a way we welcome miracles into our lives. So this week I have asked myself which daily miracles do I overlook? It does not have to be inexplicable, it just needs to be unexpected and special.

Today, the thunder showers are a miracle, unexpected and welcoming in our time of need.

When I am feeling down, and receive a text, call or visit from someone who is special to me, that is regarded as a miracle.

Having someone sent to ease a burden, offer support and encouragement without being asked, is a miracle.

Meeting somebody who years down the line has incidentally played a huge role in shaping a prosperous future - is a divine miracle.

Being surrounded by people who volunteer themselves to add value to your life, with no hidden agenda - is a miracle.

Watching my little nephews and nieces develop into personalities of their own- is a special miracle.

And more importantly, being loved unconditionally is truly a miracle in my eyes. And having my children know love, and feel free to express love and show it- even more of a miracle.

We live in such a cynical society that our first instinct when faced with a 'miracle' is to question it. To try and reason why it happens, to dissect the meaning and find the reason or cause. Trauma and life has taught us to be on our guard at all times, to be careful of who we 'let in'. I know this firsthand, having gone through a big part of my life not trusting just anyone, not letting everyone see me. I used it as a coping mechanism, having experienced trauma at a young age, I didn't feel safe enough to trust.

What I realised, is that by closing certain parts of myself off, I was not allowing miracles to happen. I was not allowing the grace of the divine to enter my life, regardless of my religious practices. By not sharing my value, by not serving others I was wrapped up in my own things, trying to protect myself from hurt- and in the process choosing not to heal. Once I had chosen to shed those behaviours, and open myself up to love, and to be authentic with others, did I make space for miracles to happen.

And they happened, everyday, and at times I am surprised by them, and at other times I am just thankful. I am just thankful to have undertaken a journey into myself to be able to understand my inner workings, my value, and what I have to offer.

That, on it's own, is a miracle to me.

Today's post features a bohemian maxi dress, which I bought from the Something Pretty Pop Up store. I really adore their unique pieces, which is imported by the beautiful Tasneem, who certainly has an eye for amazing pieces. This dress represents my unconventional side, seen by the way I have styled it - with a sleeveless denim jacket and rose gold sneakers. The bodice of the dress is beaded, which blends in with the pretty pattern, ticking all the requirements for a classic fashion item in my wardrobe (some glam with a touch of alternative).