Life goes on #PostHajj

Weclome dear readers!

Occasionally I find my mind drifting to Saudi shores, and very quickly I'm abruptly brought down to earth by some or other task needing my immediate attention. I suppose the reason Hujjaj's thoughts keep wandering back to Saudi is to relive that intense spiritual connection, where nothing but prayer mattered. Where one felt as if you had a direct line of communication to the Divine, where miracles happened all around you.

 Someone once told me that they felt depressed upon returning from Hajj, sad and despondent with the constant yearning to return. I certainly yearn to return, but I have to consciously remind myself that my Hajj continues here and now.

My life back home is actually the continuation of the journey I undertook, the pilgrimage merely being more of an initiation into a certain way of life, and of a new perspective on life and one's purpose. I have started doing a #HajjSeries on the blog and these posts will be shared as I am able to articulate the aspects I'd like to share. As I process these, life as I now know it evolves every day. I still have long conversations about the journey, with people, with my hubby... And every time another penny drops, and another message reveals itself. I can see why people who have journeyed for Hajj more than 30 years ago, can still relate as if it was yesterday. The experience will forever remain in the consciousness, alive with endless new perspectives.

I have returned with so much to share with my kids, and in turn they have so much to share with me (lessons learnt during my absence). I chat to them about how I had to master acceptance, of trials and difficulties, and having to embrace the fact that we would never be burdened with situations which we would not be able to deal with. We talk about how deeply this journey has altered me, and how I intend to live with the newfound realisations. It is important, and difficult, but my intention is to live in a way that honours my pilgrimage. I aim to honour it by being mindful of the potent energy of spirituality which always surrounded me in Saudi, so potent that one is immediately caught up in it. 

Living in remembrance of my Hajj is a daily struggle... learned behaviours creep in very quickly and once one is back in the familiar environment, old habits can easily return. Patience (Sabr) is something I had to learn and practice on this journey, and I am consciously trying to incorporate it into everything I do. This includes how I deal with plans going awry, teenage issues and managing the expectations and judgement of others. When one returns from pilgrimage, the expectations and judgement becomes a tangible thing, and I have to remind myself that I have changed fundamentally, and I therefore need to approach these matters with an revised mindset... i.e.
To be the best I am able to be, for my CREATOR & MYSELF.

Today's lookpost was taken some time ago, when I had a burning need to be at the beach (my ultimate happy place), to smell the sea air and absorb the beautiful energy of the coast. Even though the sun was out, the air was cool, hence the need for a light silk bomber.

 

Outfit details:

Asos Maxi dress (old)

Human Image silk bomber

Lacoste Rose Gold sneakers (purchased on Asos)

LV Bag (LV Paris)

Jo Borkett Scarf

Ralph Lauren sunglasses (Sunglass Hut Bali)

Necklace gifted

Swarovski bracelet

Various gold arm jewellery

Ciao for now,

RuBe xoxo

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Ramadaan with teens

Welcome readers, 

It's Friday already (gasp!) and I honestly cannot fathom that the week has flown by so fast. I certainly don't feel the usual worn out exhaustion after a hectic week, and yet, it's been a wonderfully productive work week whilst fasting and observing all my supplications. I really do feel the tranquility of this month has once again enveloped my home, and all of the occupants.

The reality remains that with a houseful of growing teenage boys, they get hangry as the day and the month progresses. But even with this, the calm has resulted in them being less argumentative, less annoyed with each other, even with the exam stress hanging in the air. I try to ensure that their suhoor (breakfast) is nutritious and filled with brain food and enough protein to keep them going. It's a task which is hard to accomplish when these young sportsmen still take the time to train at home, or just kicking a ball around when they're bored, burning through their energy reserves. One of the things they've had to forego is their sports schedule, partly because logistically it's difficult to co-ordinate and partly because I want them to focus on study and increased recitation. We have over the years created our own unique traditions, favourite fasting meals and family time, and I find it such a special time to bond during this month. 

The first week has whizzed by, but not without serious self evaluation and introspection. I've sat and pondered on how I engage, how I serve and how I set an example to lead by. My legacy is the only thing which is worth being conscious of, and here I'm not referring to a legacy of wealth. The legacy I refer to is the example I set as a parent, to the values I embody, live by and instill in my offspring. My kids are the next generation who will need to do the same, they too will need to be self aware and understand that there will always be work towards being the best version of yourself. I would love to ensure that they know that their amazing individual talents have been gifted to them, for them, and to serve. I would love to ensure that they know that living authentically is so much more rewarding that chasing the almighty buck.

Raising teenagers, in today's materially centered society, will always be a challenge. It will always be a challenge to remind them that pursuing wealth is not the end goal; but I live with the hope that through example and actions they will intrinsically just get it. I live with the hope that by example I have shown what really matters; and whilst it is great to have the material things, it is not the end goal, it is not the focus of life. 

Today's look is a relaxed one, with a loose fitting pants, swing frill top and gold platform sneakers. Perfectly modest and comfortable for running those endless errands.

Outfit details:

Something Pretty embellished top

Trenery cotton pants (old)

Gifted scarf

Superga flatform sneakers

Louis Vuitton bag

Caio for now, 

RuBe xoxo

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I went down the rabbit hole

 TGIF readers! 

After last weekend, which seemed to last forever I am sure it took a lot to get back into the swing of the week. 

Apart from wardrobe styling, my actual job is as a Business Strategist/ Consultant/ Coach/ Mentor, a path I have chosen to follow to empower individuals in their respective businesses. Whilst I was scheduled to see clients this week, it turned out to be a challenging one, so some meetings were postponed. And it so happened that these cancellations actually gave me some time to work on another project which I have a crushing deadline for. 

This made me realise that sometimes the universe knows what is best, that things will happen as they are meant to. The trick is to accept this when it happens, not to fight it, as it generally brings us to the opportunities meant to be on our path. For a long time I chose to disregard this serendipitous occurrences, however big or small they may have been. But as I opened myself up to the premise that anything can happen... Anything literally happens!

I have had to learn to take each day as it comes, knowing firsthand what working from day to day, month to month, all with the promise of a vacation as a break from it, can do to the soul. This was the pace of corporate, constantly chasing the money for the good of the 'business', working towards targets and deadlines, oblivious of the harm I was inflicting upon myself. At this point, it felt like life was a hamster wheel, and each day ran into each other, same same, different people. Little by little my soul was stripped, and after enough time my body decided to give me a push. And it was not a little push, it was a downright scary rabbit hole I didn't have the energy to navigate. I took some extended time off to recuperate, and in that time I started seeing that my passion is what my life should be about. I realised that even though I had a plan, it may not have been the plan that was destined for me. 

And down the rabbit hole I ventured...

Where I found the time to recuperate, heal and learn to listen to life, instead of dictating to life. And at the bottom of the rabbit hole I found health, my connection with the Divine, rediscovered the written word, explored my creative side and started working on improving myself. After going through many processes of growth (and will probably continue for as long as I am breathing...) I found a space where I am able to add value and empower others. I discovered the other side of 'chasing the money', the side where making a difference is the bottom line, equipping others to find their rabbit hole (hopefully without the health issues) and ultimately open themselves up to "anything can happen". 

After all, having gone down there myself, I can be the google maps, assisting in navigating the way! 

😊

Today's look is a mix up of glam and casual, a perfect representation of my life after going down the rabbit hole. Being open to anything, this outfit is an expression of that, some sequins, textures and sneakers, literally a bit of everything!

 

Outfit details:

River Island Dubai skirt (old)

Spree top (old)

Lacoste rose gold sneakers (Asos)

Michael Kors bag

LV scarf

Ralph Lauren sunglasses (Bali)

Make a Statement beaded earrings

Swarovski bracelet

Chanel lips

Ciao for now, 

RuBe xoxo

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Knowing my limits

Hi lovelies, 

For those of you who follow me on social media, you would have seen that I have recently stepped down from my role in the Islamic Fashion and Design Council of South Africa. This was a very profound week for me, as I had to come face to face with startling realisations and make some tough decisions. 

These realisations focused mainly around work, were all preceded by warning signs and whispers from those close to me; and when I evaluated the direction I'd like to pursue in terms of my future, the choices were pretty clear. It's rather easy to try and keep juggling too many balls, in fact for me it is easier to do that than to actually stand back and evaluate what I really need to do. I just juggle in auto mode. However, this week, accompanied by the crazy work schedule I was trying to manage, all directed me to one obvious decision. And in the same manner in which I exited the corporate world, it again took me a while to accept what I needed to do. But once the decision was clear, I took the step without hesitation.

I understood that something in my life needed to shift, to allow me the space to grow in the direction I know I need to go. Most of my weighty decisions are usually accompanied by prayer and the call for Divine guidance, as I believe things happen the way they are meant to. So I sat with the choice I needed to make, reflected on how my inability to make the decision sooner impacted my life and would continue to do so to my detriment. I contemplated what was necessary and what was non negotiable, and reassessed my priorities. With the insanely crazy year I have already had, its hard to believe that I haven't come to the conclusion sooner, that I needed to let go of things to be able to step into a new space.

What I have learnt, and will continue to learn... is to listen to my intuition and not ignore warning signs. I have learnt that letting go of something is not necessarily a bad thing, in fact it is essential to do this at least a few times in life. I have learnt that we cannot always determine exactly how the future turns out, we can only take each day step by step, living authentically and true to ourselves. I have learnt that ultimately whatever has been decreed, will be, regardless of the path we choose to take to get there. 

Today's lookpost is a light one, reflective of the space I find myself in today. I feel lighter and ready to face whatever comes my way, this super casual ensemble represents the openness with which I aim to approach life. 

The sequin parka paired with a black t-shirt and skinny jeans is an everyday chilled look, finished off with sneakers and an easy backpack, which I grabbed in London on my last holiday.  Perfect inspiration for mommies managing kids during the school holidays.

Outfit details:

Coast & Koi sequin parka

H&M t-shirt

Style Republic skinny from Spree

Adidas ZA sneakers

French Connection leather backpack

Woolworths scarf

Dream necklace from Lovisa

Ciao for now, 

RuBe xoxo

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Valentine's Musings

Welcome lovely readers, 

This week Valentine's Day was the highlight for many, for me, it was another weekday peppered with romantic posts and images of flowers and hearts popping up every couple of minutes. Hubby and I don't really do a big Valentine's Day fuss, although I got the cutest card and I just about managed a special sushi dinner to be delivered for the two of us. But I really do enjoy seeing the declarations of love everywhere, couples planning romantic evenings and just the effort people put into making their significant other feel special and adored. 

It gives me hope in humanity, at a time when our news headlines report daily murders, rapes, child abuse and gang violence. The cynics may say it is a huge marketing drive, aimed at consumers who spend money unnecessarily. I would think that if we at least have one day in the year that people can take the time out of busy schedules to connect, then I am all for it. I believe it is important to let your special partner know they are appreciated and loved, and sometimes our lives are so busy that we pass each other by like ships in the night. 

Our time becomes so consumed by chores, work, family, routine and of course, social media, that time passes by in a haze of activities. None of which is planned, and occasionally we remember the abandoned practice of a weekly date night, and resurrect it for maybe two weeks before life engulfs us again. And on those dates nights, parents spend the time watching the clock, worried about the baby with the sitter or wondering if the homework is done and if the kids are down for the night. (I am clearly referring to myself here...)

For me this week passed by in a blur, with a stolen moment to post a cheesy Valentine's Day picture for my guy and then back to crazy. However, hubby and I usually take time to catch up while I'm cooking, or while we're waiting for the eldest to get home. We try to grab the little moments to check in with each other, a call during the day or by sending an uplifting note. 

With that in mind, and the fact that I now have the time... I dedicate these few words to my other half, my best friend, confidant and biggest supporter:

I know life grabs us and throws us into the whirlpool, 

I know it sometimes feels like a neverending rollercoaster, 

But I also know that without you by my side,

I'd feel washed out and fatigued, 

I'd feel sick and weary. 

You bring a vitality to my days, 

And a purpose to my ramblings.

You make me feel like I can do anything, 

Like I can vanquish any obstacle.

And with you by my side, 

I know the sky is the limit.

And with these words

I want you to know this,

I love you, 

I appreciate you,

and

Pray that we're blessed with many more adventures.

💑

Today's post is a Valentine inspired outfit, the romantic floaty skirt, paired with the pink leopard print top finished off with statement pearls.

Once again, all pieces worn are classic items, some of them from about 3-4 years ago.

Outfit details:

Witchery pleated skirt

Glamour top from Asos

Daniella Michelle heels

Scarf bought abroad

Studded pastel bag from ZARA

Superbalist pearl necklace

Ralph Lauren sunglasses purchased abroad

Caio for now, 

RuBe xoxo

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